Well done for going back and staying the full four hours. I know you have lots of physical symptoms, but your feelings sound very much like I used to feel after I was first diagnosed with ectopics - I was pretty much in a panic attack most of the day. If I had my husband with me I was much better, but still felt ill. Anywhere that involved enclosed spaces or interaction or groups of people made me panic. The nativity play in the school hall wasn't much fun that year, I can tell you.

The thing is, you have done the worse bit, the actual going back. You have done it and survived. The feeling of disassociation will pass eventually. You should be really proud of yourself. Don't give up now, when you've so well. Best wishes.

Right Angie - you did really well. Ignore the symptoms for a minute. You got there, you did it. And nothing happened. Nothing but a whole load of useless and unhelpful symptoms. Which you still get because your brain associates the experience with scariness.

You have to get back there without thinking too much about it. Your brain needs to unlearn the scariness associated with the experience. Whether it is at work, school run, any social situation, even going to the shops or just a home (in many of our cases). You can only do that by constantly exposing yourself to the situation and undergoing positive thoughts and experiences.

You will eventually have some positive thoughts and moments during the daywhich you need to note. And afterwards you need to note the positive. Even if it is - hey, I didn't collapse!!! It might take a long time but it will happen. You have taken the most frightening step by getting out there again and being there.

It is so tough - I am with there with you as I am out at work too. Today I was teaching all day - ectopics like you wouldn't believe and odd shots of panic and dizzy spells. You have to tough it out like I am doing. I think it is the only way to get better. I can't say it's pleasant but it seems the only way through or become a miserable recluse getting worse and worse at home, where your whole world eventually closes in on you - because ultimately everything becomes scarey even being at home alone.

Saab - right there with you on the social situations and school nativity one - I have one coming up and last years was a blur of panic. Just sitting in the school hall with lots of people was enough to put me on 100% anxiety. Any social situation now has me like an ectopic wreck.

Angie - you are doing so well. Do not let today's bad feelings get in the way of the better ones you will feel next time you go in. Persevere - nothing is going to happen to you. Anxiety is just a horrible friend you have to ignore - they keep hanging about - but they won't go away unless you ignore them and focus on a better kinder and more helpful friend!

xxx

Thanks for the support!  Much appreciated, believe me.

Well, i went to work and i did it, i still suffered and really did not want to be there but i stayed and saw my patients.  It was difficult and hard to do and to concentrate as i was still spinning and floating.
Now my neck and up the back of my head is hurting and my ears are all off and funny again.  Feel full and 'dull' as if shutting off then this scares me as i think i will collapse and faint.  I know i never have but i have been very close a few times i think.
My bp was 99/63 which freaked me a bit, but i was reading sitting in a warm car at the time so that might be because i was quite relaxed right then.  Still worries me though.
I will go into work tomorrow and again just see how i go, if i can i will and if i can't then i will leave, the option is there and i suppose that makes me feel a little better even though i would feel very guilty and bad if i had to leave.  Dreading tomorrow, just like i was this morning and the unreality has been rearing his ugly head again on and off, sometimes quite severe today.  Now i sit here writing this i can't believe that i have been work and done it, seems like it never happened now to be honest.  But as i say, i will go tomorrow and try and just see how it goes again.
The thought of having to go there over and over for four times a week freaks me out, trying not to think about it, i think this is the depression rearing it's ugly head though.
Thanks again guys and i will keep you posted.x

Thanks bead.
It has worried me about you saying that i must have low bp though.  If that is the case then why didn't i suffer like this before i was ill?  Does that make sense.  Or is it like ME?  As then they do have the symptom of low bp but in my experience in the surgery it is in the 40's or 50's when moving about.
When i am moving about or active my bp is fine and stable.  But if i am sitting, warm, relaxed etc then it is 90's over 60's - that is perfectly normal isn't it?  Don't know what these 'funny' turns are though as my bp goes up when i get up, i have checked many times.  So perhaps that is it, the reverse, it is lower sat relaxed and i get up quick and it goes up, lol.  I don't know but i don't like it.  I don't want to have low bp or high bp, i just want to be normal again.xx

Thankyou so much for your help.  It means so much to me.
I am trying but what keeps me going is knowing that if i can't then i just won't do it.  I go with that thought in mind and it does make a difference.  I am supposed to stay and do it all - end off!  But my hubby is with me for now, outside of course lol, and if it becomes too much or too hard then i ring the boss say how sorry i am and off i go.  Having that option open to me at this point in time is invaluable, believe me.
Been thinking, and if i had a low bp then surely i would have the symptoms more often, everyday or most of the time.  Like, everytime i stood up or something.  I don't get it like that, it just comes on for no reason and feels like something is cutting off more than anything else really.  I have found a web page on line that states that mostly a normal bp should be from 90/50mmhg, which made me feel a lot better i can tell you.  I have 'gone funny' and taken my bp quickly thinking it would be that, and my bp was fine at the time.  So i don't think it could be that, do you?
Anyway, i don't know, just wish it would go away!!x

Okay, let's take care where crossing the line from offering support to attempting to diagnose symptoms in the absence of formal medical training. No offense intended, but folks with anxiety can suddenly find  themselves on a runaway train as a consequence of someone's interpretation of symptoms. This is a point not open for discussion. For anyone on the forum who is not a licensed physician, then please refrain from actually trying to determine or diagnose or point out the cause for someone's symptoms. It's perfectly fine to discuss any similar course or outcome that you've personally experienced, but please take care that it doesn't suggest specific medical advice. If you obtain a response that suggests it has, be sure to retract your statement if it's been misinterpreted.

Angie, I don't believe your symptoms are associated with your blood pressure in the traditional sense. By that, I mean that I don't believe that you suffer from hypotension. Your symptoms are more closely associated with anxiety and the pain in the back of your neck is likely due to musculo-skeletal tension.

You have to realize that anxiety plays a very major role in its ability to interfere with a process known as homeostasis, a term used to describe the body's ability to carry on physiological processes in a manner normal for internal and external conditions. Many people with anxiety tend to breathe shallow and especially under circumstances where they are active, such as walking through a mall, small changes begin to take place with blood/gas imbalances. Although slight, these changes can cause you to feel faint, become dizzy, feel pressure in or just behind the ears, loss of hearing, and cause you to experience tunnel-vision wherein things begin to grow dark, sense tingling sensations in the extremities and a host of other symptoms. These sensations tend to cause panic that something bad is happening and only causes symptoms to become worse.

Here's a good example that will highlight just how much the nervous system can have an impact on homeostasis. As a person in the medical field, certainly you've heard about military soldiers who regularly faint while standing at attention for extended periods. This is a perfect example and does not indicate that these soldiers have any type of disease or illness whatsoever. Standing very still for long periods lowers vagal tone, meaning that the aterioles in the lower extremities become relaxed and gravity works against the body's blood distribution, decreasing perfusion. If it reaches a certain threshold, the person will either feel faint or actually faint. It doesn't mean that these persons have problems with their blood pressure whatsoever.

The same is true for medical students exposed to graphic surgery or other invasive technique for the first time. I can't tell you how many students have toppled in front of me at the site of watching me perform a lumbar puncture procedure. They're fine other than the bruise to their pride. These examples are absolutely no different in content that what you are presently experiencing. You have to realize that your symptoms are not the consequence of physical disease or illness of any type, but rather the imposition of anxiety upon your nervous system.

You also need to refrain from trying to make a direct comparison between your symptoms and your blood pressure. Remember that blood pressure is an extremely dynamic process, meaning that it changes within a broad context by comparison to the body's demands at any given time. The readings you mention, 99/63, that "freaked" you a bit, should not have done so because it means absolutely nothing by comparison to your symptoms. I don't consider the reading to suggest hypotension in any event and I think you've become overly vigilent to the suggestion that your symptoms are the representation of hypotension or other blood pressure disorder. I do not believe it to be the case.

By the way, the sensation in your throat is known as Globus Hystericus and is only the sensation of your throat feeling closed off or swollen, again a symtom of anxiety and panic disorder. Please realize that these symptoms represent a disturbance of the nervous system only, not a sign of disease. You're going to be fine in that regard.

Try and relax. You truly are going to be fine and these symptoms will not decrease your life by even a day.

Best regards and Good Health  

No apologies necessary at all. The forum is certainly a place for you to relate to each other regarding symptoms. I'm sure you understood my position, however, with making the distinction between relating to one's symptoms versus diagnosing the underlying cause. We're fine.

It's simply important to keep in mind that one symptom can represent a multitude of concerns depending upon the company it keeps, or in other words any other symptoms that may be present and what they may collectively represent. It's also important to realize that in the presence of pre-existing conditions, symptoms can mean something else entirely. This is why it's critical not to presume that symptoms in one individual are represented in necessarily the same way within another person without knowing a bit more information or history. It's common for physicians to not only catalogue the various contact history of their patients, but to constantly match the information in the history against common algorithms associated with certain disorders, diseases, etc. to increase suspicions or rule out the presence of pathology. This process takes place both mentally and through documentation, literally becoming second nature for the physician when dealing with their patients and represents numerous considerations in many instances prior to discussing symptoms and ordering tests, etc.

In the case of the forum, we're simply here to guide members and guests with medical information and to offer reassurance. We know from training & experience what constitutes a concern, but we're never here to supplant the direct examination and evaluation by the primary care physician or specialist.

A forum can sometimes walk a fine line between information and advice, so it's very critical make the distinction. In the case of the forum, its best work is done when we carefully provide information and guidance to support the relations between members. In that way, we each serve a function that can be consistently relied upon to offer the greatest amount of accurate information possible.  

Best regards and Good Health