Well Seffie, this is not like you've failed to do your homework assignments on time and we'll be sending you to detention.
Part of your hopes in being able to see a different physician also would bring relief that you don't have to face the former doctor's reprisal for not having followed his instructions, which we term
avoidance behavior. It's certainly understandable, but you have to recognize that the scenario you are anticipating is representative of the root cause of your anxiety disorder.
Trust me, this is not unfamiliar territory for me. It doesn't matter how your doctor responds. He's just a physician and it won't set him at a point adversarial to you. You're concerned that you haven't pleased him by following directions and now he'll be upset with you. Many folks with anxiety don't like people to be upset with them and often go well out of their way under other circumstances to be people pleasers, even if it's to their own detriment. I have patients who complain that it feels like they're not even living their own life because of a compelling need to meet the preferences and expectations of others.
Now, back to basics. If you can't tolerate the beta blockers then there are plenty of alternatives. As for the aspirin, it's the cardiologist's favorite OTC prophylaxis for the vascular system and heart. I don't recall your age, but unless you have risk factors for a stroke or heart disease then it's really not a necessity. Additionally, most people in this category can also benefit from a single baby aspirin daily rather than the adult formula, so it doesn't require a great amount to work well. Regardless, I don't have any tests results in front of me but I have to tell you here that I believe your condition is merely benign palpitations as a consequence of Vagus nerve stimulation and not a fibrillation anomoly. I think many times that folks with benign palpitations will drive so hard for a concrete answer that they'll get one.
You're merely seeking reassurance for a condition that does not exist in your case. There's nothing wrong with your heart and you can go to a specialist repeatedly and still obtain negative results. It's just not going to change and the only thing driving your fears in the compulsory thought patterns that are saying "yes doctor, I've heard you and I've seen the test results, but what if my case is different? After all, they've not found the cause. Therefore, in my mind it remains a constant threat each time it occurs. What if my heart stops as a consequence? What if it damages my heart in some way and when I'm old I'll have all kinds of heart problems? What if all of this could have been prevented if only caught in time?"
Seffie, at some point you are going to have to examine what is driving you to mistrust factual evidence in favor of your own perspectives. If you'll look at the history of this entire event, you'll see that nothing physical has actually happened to you, which is far more in alignment with your test results. It's not your heart, but merely an inappropriate nerve impulse from the Vagus nerve that causes benign palpitations and we don't spend millions of dollars in research and test equipment for the purpose of detecting benign or harmless physiological responses. We focus our efforts on equipment, research and training to detect the problems that threaten physical health and since your tests are negative, they're negative. You're no different. Your case is not unique or special or undetectable for some strange reason. It's a documented medical fact and tests conclusively prove that you don't have heart disease and that the cause of your palpitations is therefore, benign in every regard. No exceptions.
Your focus must shift from seeking a physical cause for the palpitations toward identifying and understanding the erroneous thought patterns which compel you to be fearful that something dreadful may be at hand and that it is your increasing mistrust and lack of confidence that moves you to seek reassurance.
You're going to be fine and your cardiologist will not punish you for failing to follow advice. Remember that it's advice you paid for and so it belongs to you, along with the freedom to follow it or reject it as you choose.
Best regards and Good Health